My father passed away when I was young and I honestly do not remember how the power was divided between him and mom. What I do remember is that my mom took care of my sister and me, and made sure we had everything we needed. She was a strong woman, and I wanted to be a strong woman too.I remember this really annoying boy in middle school. I used to complain about him to mom, who would often say, “Sounds like he could use some discipline.” I found this funny since this boy took karate, which I thought taught discipline. I learned in ninth grade that he was only annoying to me because he liked me and didn’t know how to show it. That was when we began dating—we would go to movies, we would hang out, and he was actually quite nice and usually we would do what I wanted. And, yes, this was Brad.
Sometimes, however, we would do what Brad wanted, and occasionally he even yelled at me when I suggested something. I always hated that, because there was never any reason for it. It pissed me off so bad, and I would remember what my mom said—that he needed discipline, and I would agree. I even started karate to be with him more, but he teased me about this, too, implying that I wouldn’t be any good.
I couldn’t figure out where these sexist thoughts of his were coming from, since there were many girls in karate, and I knew his mom was a strong woman. I had seen her threaten Brad with spankings many times and he would always straighten up. It was this that made me think he needed more discipline than he got; I just didn’t think it would be me to do it.
We broke up during junior year of high school, both of us agreeing that it wasn’t working. We went our separate ways in college, and I dated other guys. But for some unknown reason I kept thinking about Brad. I kept comparing all my boyfriends to him and realized that I really liked it when he did what I wanted. It was only when he got angry and yelled that I had a problem with him.
So I was pleasantly surprised and actually excited when he invited me to his college graduation party. We talked about “old times,” and he apologized for all of the things he had done to hurt me and promised this would never happen again. This made me happy, but he didn’t seem to want to get back together. But we kept hanging out together, and I kept trying to get him interested, until I finally asked him right out if he wanted to go out again. He told me that he did, and I told him that I really wanted to go out with him again, but that I would not accept the behavior he had displayed before.
That was when Brad surprised me by saying, “You might have to spank me if I do.” That was when the idea of me disciplining him when he did something I did not like first came to mind. I jokingly asked him if he meant like his mom used to, and he blushed so red! It was cute.
Everything went really well between us until Brad decided to go back to school and get his master’s. With this schedule he was really busy, and I understood that, and I did more of the chores and cooked dinner to help him out, even though we had agreed when we got back together that he would do most of the chores. I was fine with it, figuring that he would resume doing most of the chores once he had some free time. I was fine with it, that is, until Brad began making some comments on things not being clean enough, and once when I was late with dinner, he yelled at me about why wasn’t it ready.
That’s when I exploded and yelled back at him about how I was doing his chores for him and trying to help him, but he was just being an a-hole and didn’t appreciate me or my efforts on his behalf. I told him that I would not take it any more, and that he could either leave, since he had broken his promise, or he would have to accept me punishing him like he said that I should.
Brad looked truly shocked at my threatening to punish him. If I wasn’t so mad, I would have probably laughed at the expression on his face. I think my yelling woke him up, as I never shout. He told me that he was really sorry and that he loved me. And, yes, he agreed to let me punish him—and that was when I first spanked my boyfriend, the turning point in our relationship.
I gave Brad quite a few on his bare butt, and watched how it bounced quite a bit and turned very red. I only used my hand, but I did get him to cry a bit. Afterward I had him stand in the corner while I looked at his cute red ass and I decided that I actually kind of liked spanking him and seeing his cute butt turn red. After the corner time I let him get dressed and told him straight up if he needed it, I would spank him again.
Brad was really well behaved for almost a month before the stress got to him again and he yelled at me again. And as promised, he found himself over my lap again, getting a harder spanking than the first time. I soon realized that this method of punishment really worked for Brad, and that I could use it to correct other behaviors that bothered me, like his leaving clothes all over the floor, not completing his chores, and forgetting to call when he was going to be late. And as I expected, it did work. He would be very conscious of these shortcomings for a while, but every so often he would mess up and find himself one again over Shannon’s lap, or bent over the chair. This relationship works really well for us, and despite the embarrassment for my husband, I know that he agrees that it works, and that it is what he needs. There is no question now that I am in charge of our relationship, although most who know us probably see us as just a normal couple where the wife calls the shots.
A few know more. One or two of Brad’s guy friends have seen his sore butt at the gym, and he was recently strip-searched at the airport and the TSA personnel saw his sore butt as well. For the most part, however, no one knows how, or to what extent, I keep control of my husband.
I expect things to change some in the days to come. Brad will get disciplined for different things and in different ways, but we both agree that our relationship is much better now that I am in charge.